Unlocking the Power of Your Inner Child

This is a space where we explore issues in and around healing childhood trauma. And today I want to talk about something that, in my experience both personally and professionally, sits right at the core of that work: inner child healing.

Inner child work is often spoken about casually, but I genuinely see it as one of the most fundamental pillars of healing childhood trauma. It’s been invaluable for me in my own therapy, and it’s something I return to again and again in my work with clients.

In this article, I want to explore what inner child work actually is, why it matters so much, and then offer a few very practical ways you can begin this process for yourself.

So what do we mean by inner child work?

Even if the term feels familiar, it helps to slow it down. At its simplest, inner child work is based on the understanding that we all have different parts within us. There are more developed frameworks for this, like Internal Family Systems or Transactional Analysis, but we don’t need to go deep into theory here.

The basic idea is that parts of us formed in childhood are still active in the present. We tend to move through life thinking, “I’m an adult now. I’m 30. I’m 50. I’m just getting on with things.” But often there are unacknowledged or unregistered parts of us that are still stuck back in time. They’ve been suppressed, ignored, or dismissed, yet they continue to influence how we feel and behave.

It’s not that these parts are gone. It’s more that they’re waiting to be noticed.

I often think of it like a Russian doll. From the outside, it looks like one solid figure, just a person going about their life. But when you open it up, there are layers inside. More parts. Smaller figures within the larger one. That’s often what our inner world is like. On the surface, everything looks fine, but underneath there are younger parts still carrying unmet needs.

Our inner child affects us, often in ways that don’t feel helpful or constructive. Not because it’s trying to sabotage us, but because it’s trying to be acknowledged.

That’s why we work with the inner child. There are wounds that were never seen, never met, never held. Inner child work is the process of turning toward those parts with kindness and compassion, and really listening.

It’s asking questions like: what did this little boy or little girl need back then that they didn’t get? What do they still need now?

This is the heart of inner child work. Through acknowledgement and repair, through building a relationship with these younger parts, something softens. The wound begins to ease because the child finally feels seen.

If you’ve ever been around young children, you’ve probably noticed that they can nag and pull and demand attention endlessly. And often, all it takes is turning toward them and asking, “What do you need?” Once they’re acknowledged, the intensity drops.

Inner child work is similar. So much of the distress we carry is a call for recognition.

And it’s important to say that this work isn’t only about wounds. Connecting with the inner child also reconnects us to playfulness, imagination, creativity, and awe. Many people had to suppress those qualities in families where things were serious, chaotic, or unsafe. Healing the wounded child also releases the joyful child.

There’s a lot held inside this process.

So how do you begin?

One of the first things I did when I started inner child work in therapy was something very simple. I put a photo of myself as a small child by my bed. I think I was about four years old, a kindergarten photo. It wasn’t a shrine. It was just a quiet acknowledgement. There he is. That little boy still exists on some level.

Creating that small space of recognition helped establish a relationship. It made the inner child real, not abstract.

Another thing that helped me a lot was reading Homecoming by John Bradshaw. It’s a well-known book in this area, and I found it incredibly grounding. It offers a clear and compassionate understanding of inner child work, along with practical exercises. Especially if you come from a trauma background, it can feel validating and steady rather than overwhelming.

The third thing I’d recommend is working with someone. That might be a therapist, and it doesn’t have to be me. But having guidance can really help, especially at the beginning. Inner child work can feel vague, awkward, or even cringe-inducing at first. I remember feeling resistant to talking to my inner child or doing inner child meditations. It felt strange and uncomfortable.

Having support helped me move through that resistance. And once I did, something shifted. This is often why people resonate so deeply with inner child work. When it clicks, you feel it. There’s a lightening. A sense of relief. Something inside starts to settle.

Over time, you begin to notice that when you feel reactive, ashamed, or unusually irritated, there’s often a younger part underneath it. The question becomes, who is hurt here? Who feels unheard?

We may think we’re just adults responding to adult situations, but often what’s being activated is an unmet child still asking for care.

Inner child work brings awareness to that and allows healing to unfold naturally through attention, compassion, and presence.

If you have reflections or experiences around your own inner child work, feel free to share them in the comments. And if you’re interested in therapy or a free consultation with me, just reach out and I’ll send you the link.

Take care of yourself.

Info about my 30min FREE Consultation

This free consultation is a relaxed, no-pressure conversation where we can slow things down and see what’s really going on for you. It gives you a chance to share what has brought you here, ask questions about how I work, and get a sense of whether this support feels right for you. My aim is to offer some early clarity, steadiness, and a sense of direction, without any obligation to continue. It’s simply a starting point to help you decide your next step with more confidence.

You can book a time that suits you via Calendly, making it easy to find a date and time that works around your schedule.

https://www.ewanthetherapist.com/free-consulation